By Toshani
Up until a few years ago, if you asked a couple to describe how they met, you could expect a full-on Bollywood rom-com-style story. Now, there’s a pretty good chance that their answer might end in a single sentence–“Oh we matched on Bumble” This shift is not surprising at all, because technology has been absorbed into almost every other aspect of life. Because young adults have an entire social life that grows on the internet, it only makes sense that dating, something that is a pretty relevant topic when it comes to the life of young people is also impacted by the same.
Right or wrong left? The overload of choices.
Whether it’s a dating app or social media, these platforms have given people a lot of choices–perhaps too many of them. The fact that you have access to hundreds of profiles can lead to each one of them seeming less and less interesting. It’s the law of diminishing marginal utility: the satisfaction you get from each product decreases as your consumption increases. Now, while this law was made in the context of consumer behaviour, it also applies to the world of online dating. Judgments and swipes are made within a few seconds and each profile can seem less and less interesting as you scroll.
With this process, somewhere within the rush of pictures, videos and pickup lines. genuineness takes a back seat. You don’t judge a person based on their habits, behaviour and personality but instead, take a blind shot at them through their pictures. All of this takes out the emotional element that accompanies dating, relationships and eventually marriage.
Kya itna bura hu mai maa?
Dating apps, with the promises of endless conversations, can take a toll on your self-esteem. People, especially young people start judging themselves based on the validation they get on there. They start measuring their self-worth based on how many matches they get, or whether or not people on these apps find them attractive. The dependence on this fleeting online validation creates a vacuum, which can only be filled by instant gratification of attention.
Bach ke rehna re baba…
Privacy and safety are the biggest concerns when it comes to online dating. While Seema Haider crossing the border for ‘Lappu sa Sachin’ can seem very romantic, this is just one of the dramatic examples of how severe decisions driven by emotions can lead to safety concerns. Given that this is one of the extreme examples, cases of catfishing, sexual harassment, and data breaches are not unheard of.
It is not a surprise that people turn to dating apps to find their perfect match (pun intended). However, as with everything on the internet, there are huge risks that accompany this process. “Do dating apps work” or “Should you be using a dating app” are highly subjective questions. The only absolute thing that can be said about them is that like everything else on the internet, they come with their own sets of risks. If you do end up using them, you should make sure to keep in mind that these apps are a medium, not the end. They are a platform to help you connect with people and not magic wands that will end up producing you a partner.
